


I Never Breathed

by FortLauderTales



Series: These Things Are Not Meant To Be Left Behind [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, hopelessness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-02
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2019-01-28 11:42:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12605840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FortLauderTales/pseuds/FortLauderTales





	I Never Breathed

Dean throws his head back, panting. He barely winces as his head thuds hard against the tree's thick, knotty trunk. He sits, letting his arms fall to his sides, limp and drained of all energy, of any will to move for the foreseeable future. 

He closes his eyes, still breathing hard. The lights flash before his eyes in reds, oranges, yellows, taking the shapes of every kind of thing he had ever killed. They fade now, into darker hues, into the silhouettes of anyone he has ever loved. He starts to laugh quietly, the sound bubbling up from who knows where. It surprises him and he laughs harder, and harder still. 

"Can you even remember, Sammy," he gasps out between fits of laughter, "Can you even remember a time when all we were was hunters? When all we did was kill bad things? We were the good guys! We were ALWAYS, the good guys. There was never even a question about it. We were the guys you wanted on your side when the bad things went bump in the night. Way back before there were curses or...or destinies. Hell was just a story. Heaven just as made up, but without a doubt good. And angels...angels were... 

"Sam, I just want to be a hunter again. I don't want to be on the run from everything-- every thing-- ever created. Hell, I'd even give that up, the only thing I've ever know or been good at, I'll give it all up if it means I can just breathe. I just want to fucking breathe, and to know...to be sure for once that this breath will not be my last. I'm...I'm tired, man. I'm tired and I'm not 25 anymore. I'm not even 35. And I never got a chance to just fucking breathe, you know? I'm gonna die and I've never even breathed. Isn't that...isn't that kinda funny, Sammy? If that's not the stupidest shit I ever heard. Hey, Sammy! Put that on my gravestone, ok? 'Here Lies Dean Winchester: He Died A Bunch And Never Lived, Never Loved, And Never Breathed'. Ain't that some fucked up shit?"


End file.
